Things FFVIII characters would never say…

Like… ummm…

Squall: FLOWERS FOR YOU! I REALLY LIKE FLOWERS!!!

Rinoa: I hate everyone! Get out of my sight! I HATE YOU ALL!

Zell: Ewww… hotdogs.

Irvine: Women are the most ugliest things on Earth.

Selphie: WAR AND HATRED TO US ALL!!! WOOHOOO!!!

Quistis: …

Well, I really can’t think any good ones right now. 🙁

(Also, close this thread if it’s no good.)

Raijin: "We’re seifer’s followers…"

He would say this, exept for one part…

Fujin: Things that have more than one word…

Seifer: "Squall, you’re much stronger than me, congratulations!"

Squall: "Of course it is of your buisness!"

Irvine: "I’m gay, i hate guns, they’re dangerous"

things they’ed never say:

Squall: "My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard" XD
Zell:"Does this vest make my butt look big?"
Rinoa: "j00 r /\/0+ t3|-| 1337/\/3$$!!! (joo are not teh leetness)!!!!!11!!"
Irvine: "dawg…wtf…50 cent is my hero…"
Cid: "tingle tingle kumbo limpah!" (Zelda reference, some may catch this)

meh…

Ok guys im not against threads like this but you gotta at least make em original. Also using there sexuality gets bring real fast as a joke.

Squall:yoyoyo seifer pick up the beat
Seifer:yeah bro
Squall:i sting like a bee float like a butterfly so what if i renzokukened a guy he needed tha poundin that it did cause thats how we roll roll
Seifer thats pretty um Hmm
Squal pretty what homey doggsta
Seifer:stop that nigga
Raijin: one o u ganstaz call yo

Rinoa: "Whatever…"

Squall: "Oh-My-Ga…I like, have no ability to like, hide my feelings. I’m just like… a waterfall of like, emotions *giggle*"

Zell: "*yawn* Meh… I don’t feel like fighting. I’d rather sleep all day and get fat."

Selphie: "…"

Irvine: "Oh, I totally suck with guns… I couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn. This is actually just a BB gun I found behind Garden."

Quistis: "Have you fought T-Rexar in the Training Center yet? Oh, well I did and I kicked his ass! Yeah, cause I"m the greatest. You know, I became a SeeD when I was like, 15 and I got my instructor’s license at 17. Beat that loser!"

Edea: "Yes Squall. You were there.. You were always crying about something, you big baby. Doesn’t look like things have changed much, eh? Still wandering around, looking for Sis… Boo frikkin hoo! I should’ve told you she died when I had the chance! Maybe then you would’ve shut up for a while!"

Cid: "I’m not a coward! A captain always goes down with his ship! So thats why I’m NOT putting you in charge Squall. Nida, hand over the wheel, I’m taking over!"

Seifer "Oh, I just love the way the trees look in spring!"

Laguna: "Don’t worry, I know exactly what I’m doing!"

I might think of some more later, but I’ll probably forget to…

mac_mogul — I thoguht the Cid one was easily the best one posted here so far.

I honestly can’t think of anything good so far, so I’m just gonna not add anything, rather than post anything that might be embarrassing.

mac_mogul — I thoguht the Cid one was easily the best one posted here so far.

Oddly enough, it was the easiest one to think of :p

Riona: God dammit, first i had 2 play "Tifa" and had to have a breast enlargement, then i get to play "Riona", a fool who always gets the team in shit, now i get a new role "yuna" in some other FF installment and i suppose that shes complete dumbass who has the weight of the world on her shoulders!!!! when will i get a better role? Ahh probably "Ashe"? 🙁

Squall: mann Laguna is soooo f**king cool, me leg also gets f**ked when i get around SEXY boys! XD

Quistis: I had feelings for you Squall, why do you have to be gay?

Zell: People, how many times do i have to tell you this, im a chicken wuss and i dont want to go to the training centre its too creepy! 🙁

Seifer: PEAAAAAAAAAAAACE, LOOOOOOOOVE…hehehehe (playing in the garden flowers in Win Hill)

Irvine: I shall become one with the sourceress Ultimicia!

Raijin: Seifer is such pussy! %^#$%#% >:-X

Fujin: I feel pretty, Oh, so pretty, I feel pretty and witty and bright! And I pity Any girl who isn’t me tonight…. lal lal lalalal

Selphi: DECISION, TRABIA GARDEN, DESTROY!!!

Matron (Edea): Sorry my children for what i have done, i was on my period and it kinda pissed me off!

Sourceress Adel: (looks to Riona in jealousy), i wish i have tits like that….oh i know, if we combine and i attach her to me chest, i shall regain her breasts! XD

back 17 yrs in the past, in Deling City

Laguna: Kiros, WTF r we doing in here? we got sum ass to kick!
Kiros: I am the only black soldier in Galbadia and i refuse to let them use me!
Ward: (drinks Slim Fast drink) Wheres that gym in Deling, i must lose weight asap!!!

AND FINALLY…

Sourceress Ultimicia: (Argues with FFVIII makers)… Hellooo, mars to Galbadia or Esthar or whatever! how can i be the FINAL boss and never make an appearance in the entire game?!

Squall: I love each and everyone of you.

Squall: Wanner sex?

Squall: So, Rinoa, you wanted to go on a date?
Rinoa: …
Squall: Oh, come on!!! You know you want to :3.

Zell: Seifer I…
Seifer: Don’t speak… I know.
Zell: But…
Seifer: Sh sh sh! No… I know, love. *total yaoi make out – droooooool*

Seifer: Sorry Roina, this is the only way I could save my girlfriend Adel!!!
Riona: No, please! I am sure there is a plastic surgery somewhere in Esthar!
Seifer: NO…I ALREADY PAID ALL MY GIL TO DR.ODINE AND DID NOTHING…CANT YOU SEE, I HAVE NO MONEY LEFT EVEN TO BUY A NEW CAPE!!!
Riona: Seifer… There are other girls in Esthar who isn’t 2m long and all muscley and have no breasts!
Seifer: Shhh…it is begining, When Adel Awakes you two will merge and the time compression will take place and sexy Adel will take your body!
Squall breaks in…
Squall: SEIFER………I STILL HAVENT HAD SEX WITH RIONA, COULD YOU DELAY THIS FOR LATER!?
Riona: ….. (in a shock)

Ok guys im not against threads like this but you gotta at least make em original. Also using there sexuality gets bring real fast as a joke.

Uh… I guess i was the only person to read this before I posted…

Squall: So like, there I was, on the bridge of the Ragnarok and like ohmygod, I just had to fly it! Woo hoo! A ship that isn’t even mine from like god-knows-how-long in the past, I didn’t care! It’s got fancy rocket engines! Oh, and did I mention this kickin’ theme music. (giggles)

SQUALL LEONHART: Identity Theft Victim

Identity Theft Solutions — free with any Citicard.

Citi – Live Richly

Quistis: whip it! whip it good!

Squall stuck for words talking to rinoa: I like the colour and smell of your socks

Squall: I am going to need your help.
Zell: You are right, squall i need to be more mature.
Seifer: I don’t want to be the squad leader.

If any of those characters have said that, i am only up to the tomb of the unknown king.

Seifer: Hey zell ur not dressed yet do u want me to help u get that fly zipped up.
zell: sure just make sure u dont zip my thong.
Seifer:dont worry honey I never will do anything like that.*puts his hand in his pants and gives him a wedge*
zell:ahhh..that was so called for…ooo I hope we find that matching thong we were looking at in the newspaper.

Cid:A small faction in a town ive never heard of wants our help.The gil is shit but we’re stuck for cash.

Quistis:Cid!Why did you have to spend all the garden funds so you could get a face like Robin Williams!?!

Squall: What? I’m not thinking of anything! I have no brain!

Zell: Who wants to dance?

Seifer: (In the middle of the intro fight) Yeah, hold on, my cell phones ringing…

Quistis: OMFG Irvine u r so hawt!!asl???

Irvine: (Shoots himself when trying to show off)

Biggs: MUMMY!!!

Wedge: When do I get paid?

Selphie: Haha, Trabia got pwnt

Edea: Fancy a cup of tea, Quistis?

Cid: I love Ultimecia, not you, Edea. She pwns everyone. Bwahaha.

….Selphie: Trains suck shit.

Squall: Guys, I need HELP!!

Seifer: Sorceress’ suck! I hate them!

Zell: I’m giving up Martial Arts!

Selphie: HAHA!!! No one will no it was ME who fired the bombs at Trabia. Psh, World Peace my ass!

lol, nothing else, hope u find these funny…

Laguna to Kiros: Nigger please….

Kiros: Count yourself lucky, at least you dont have to eat food through a straw.

Rinoa: Angelo, Im getting you put down.

Squall: omg Rinoa, I like totallly love your new outfit.

Rinoa: Timber can rot in hell as far as im concerned.

Selphie: I love beating up the junior classmen.

Kiros: Its just cause im black isnt it?

Squall defeats Raijin : Asta Lavista Niggero!

Squall: I care about EVERYTHING! AND, I’m n importantpart of the homo system.

Quistis: whip it! whip it good!

lol best one on here

garden master norg – wow….im green

Dr. Odine:

Squall:lol

400 POSTS!!!!!!! WOOOO HOOOOO

(Agent0042: You’re welcome to celebrate, but please don’t post strings of exclamation marks so long that it breaks the table width. Also, please don’t post lame messages just to increase your post count.)

Kiros (to Squall): Ward is saying, "Good thing you don’t look like your father." You look like your mother.
Squall: Eep! Are you my father?
Kiros: Er…no.
Squall: You can’t be my father; you’re black!
Kiros: Wait a second…
Squall: Your genes must really be mixed, dude. I’m white with blue-gray eyes!
Kiros: I’M NOT YOUR FATHER, YOU NUMBSKULL!
Squall: …You’re not?
Kiros: No!
Squall: Then how do you know what my father looks like? I don’t know what my father looks like.
Kiros: Er…Actually, you do.
(Squall blinks for a moment, then points to Ward)
Squall: He’s not my father, is he?
Kiros (groans): No! You’re dumber than Laguna!
Squall: Good thing he’s not my father, huh?
Kiros: EGAD!

That was pretty good.

That was pretty good.

Thanks!

(Over the Intercom)
Squall: Friends, SeeDs, countrymen! Lend me your ears!
Nida: Er, Squall?
Squall: I come to bury the Sorceress, not to praise her!
Nida: Squall…
Squall: The evil men do lives after them, the good is oft interred with their bones. So be it with Edea!
Nida: SQUALL!
Squall: What?
Nida: Keep it simple, okay?
Squall: Oh…okay…(turns back to intercom) Do great and don’t forget to hide the hotdogs.

Selphie: I’m just so f**king deppressed.
Ward: I was just joking, I’m not mute!

squall: omg little green people attack
Raijin: IM NOT GREEN YOU FAGGET… im blue… shit fine im black

Squall: You love me, I love you, were a great big family…
Qustis (SP?): I’ve never even TOUCHED a whip.
Squall: Is my Gunblade a gun or a blade???

Seifer: Hey, Squall, when you hot, you hot!

lol best one on here

Thx.

Squall: Are you sure you want to?
Rinoa: Yes im sure
Squall: Are you ready?
Rinoa: um…can i hold it first?
Squall: uhhh.. I dont know you might damage it..

Irvine: JUST TRADE THE GODDAMN POKEMON CARDS ALREADY!

Seifer: Oh god why? *whimpers* God I hate war! Why war?
Selphie: Cos you touch yourself at night.

tonberry: cactaur is my best friend and fuck each other when we get lonely

Squall: Rinoa, Selphie, Quistis!, clothes off! I want to choose a sex toy!
Rinoa:No Squall, I want Gilgamesh!

Squall: Rinoa, Selphie, Quistis!, clothes off! I want to choose a sex toy!
Rinoa:No Squall, I want Gilgamesh!

Ok I know I’m a bit dull but I really just don’t get that.

I think it’s a reference to the size of Gilgamesh’s "sword."

P.S. — if that doesn’t explain it, then PM me, ’cause, well, let’s not get any more explicit here.

……….nope, it doesn’t come to me….

It was a reference to his er a "SWORD" hes much bigger than the PC’s, so his "SWORD" would be much bigger

Selphie:Irvine, want the greatest sex of your life? (starts undressing)
Irvine: Your a GIRL!(Micheal jackson way and runs to zell)
Squall: Rinoa, when you gonna do that
Rinoa: When I beat you in DUEL MASTERS! LET IT RIP!!!!!
Squall: NO MORE REFERENCES TO THINGS NOT IN OUR WORLD!, I WANT LAGUNA, MY DADDY!

Okay I’ll PM agent. Young people these days.

Ifrit: Dey…have…Shiva? *Checks watch* Did…you…guys…select…40 mins…before…you…came…here? If so…there…is…still…time…for…us…three. ..to have…a threesome, Shiva…Quistis!
Squall:I’ll get the video camera.

Thats funny,

I think nearly all of the recentones are sex references so wont break Tradition

Squall: Rinoa, your constant advances have made me go mono, Irvine! weres the porn!
Irvine: Under my bed, why?
Squall: I er..a.. need the "bathroom"
Irvine:OK
Rinoa: I want to "help" you!
Squall: Er.. No i wanna take this on single handedly
Rinoa:Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

Lol! Scroll up, and it will say that theyre not supposed to be sex referenced. I only just noticed this. But like you said, there’s no point in breaking tradition, so, here we go!

Seifer:One of these days I’m gonna tell you about my ROMANTIC dream!
Selphie:Captain! Wait! I have a message from Sorceress Edea for you!
*Seifer magically appears before them and grabs the letter"
Seifer:I’ll take that thankyou!
*Magically disappears*
Selphie:Was that the captain? I have another message for him to. Captain, WAIT!
*runs inside communication tower*
Selphie:Captain? Captain?
Seifer:WHAT!!! OKAY THAT DOES IT! Cid Kramer! Your going on my list!

Ok I know that was crap, but I’m stuck for time.

Sqaull with folder: Hmm… decisions decisions
Rinoa: Whats up?
Squall presses folder to chest: Nothing, noth..
Rinoa takes folder and start laughing
Quistis: Whats so funny?
Starts laughing
Zell: Kettou Da, I challenge you
Squall: Yoshi, I accept your challenge
Girls Laugh harder
Squall: I charge mana and summon La Ura Giga, Sky Guardian
Zell: I also charge mana and summon Deadly Fighter Braid CLAW!!!, FEAR THE LIZARD ME
Irvine walks in with selphie
Irvine: What are you nerds playing, Druel Masters!, play YGO!
Sephlie: Nooooo! play PokeMon
Rinoa in demonic voice
Rinoa: Join the Darkside Play Magic TG
Quistis Laughs so hard she has a corinary

That’s a good one! Awww, you broke tradition.

Because their birthdays are so close together, Rinoa and Squall have their parties on the same day…
Squall (thru intercom):I have a special announcement. Because…well…Rinoa…Rinoa says everyones invited to the party.
*Seifer approaches Squall*
Squall:Except you, Seifer.
Seifer: Aww c’mon! If you do, I’ll get you fixed up wit Rinoa!
Squall:…Sorry, i’m not that kinda guy.
Seifer:Ok. Well, d’ya know where Rinoa is?
Squall:She’s at the Cafeteria, why?
Seifer:I’ll ask her if I can come to the party.

Another crap one. Oh well.

Sorry, I was also on on tcgplayer.com, cards on the mind, no back to depravity, I am kinda tired sorry if crap

Zell: I love siefer, he is a great Bitch

Irvine: I think waiting till marrage is a good thing and porn is wrong

Selphie: I like to "play" with Irvine and Squall

Rinoa: I am attracted to Selphie

Squall(while masterbating): I AM SO HORNEY, I LOVE RINOA’S LIPS!, I THINK SHE WOULD GIVE A GREAT HEAD JOB!SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEXS EXSEXSEXSEXSEX

Quistis: Squall, as your teacher, I will do you wether you want it or not, Every one elseis doing it

(Also, close this thread if it’s no good.)

Why hasn’t this been done yet?

Also.

Squall: Holy fuck this game sucks.

Originally Posted by Yui
(Also, close this thread if it’s no good.)

Why hasn’t this been done yet?
It’s gonna be done now, it’s getting rather lame.