A christmas poem

The kid what sassed Santa

"On Dasher, on Dancer on. . .whatcha-mafoolit
He said in a stutter, forgetting their names
On Larry, On Jimmy, On Stoney and Mudget!
(He had a bit of "sauce" after the Reindeer games)

But the Reindeer weren’t bothered
They knew of his plight
And they shot through the sky
On the cold winters night

And so did they fly
spreading Christmassy joys
To all of the good little
girlies and boys
When suddenly –

"HEY FATSO!"

It came from the right!
Santa was being sassed
– and it was during mid-flight!

He looked over his shoulder
Thought "where could he be!?
The Easter Bunny may be sassed at times-
But not Me!"

He turned the sleigh ’round
Then surveyed the ground closely
He was in North Miltilton
full of good kids… well, mostly

He pulled out his list
Which he had checked thrice
When suddenly –

"You’re a fat fatty fatty"

He’d not been sassed once but twice!

Though this sound was much clearer
And so Santa began searchin’
And he spied the whole town
Till’ he found the rude urchin

"What’s the meaning of this!?"
He said in a huff
""You’re a fat fatty fatty" yelled the kid
"And you’re not so tough!"

"You’re a fat fatty fatso!"
Yelled the kid once again
Such a terrible remark
From someone age ten

"You’re stupid and goofy
And quite smelly too!"
More stinging remarks!
What could ole’ Santa do?

Why. . .

he. . .

spanked the boy good!
As only he could
And he spanked the boy gooder
Like the boy’s parents should
And he spanked the boy goodest
Cus’ Santa’s the best!
And he left lumpy old coal
As his gift to the pest
And as he flew off,
He shouted in spite

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL
AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!

*shrieks over the evils of christmas*

*stops pretending it is christmas and reads the poem*

I liked it very much. It has that Dr. Suess-y feel a little, but that isn’t really a bad thing. Plus it has that rezo touch and stuff, which means it’s going to make Mandi giggle.