Things Final Fantasy Characters Wouldn’t Say

Sqaull: your hair is fabulous, Rinoa

Barret: Don’t kill me, take Marlene.

Irvine: I think I’m gay.

Angelo: Meow

Yuffy: Materia is for wimps

Barret: hey is there any jobs going around in Shinra, I’m thinking of applying,

post yours

Session Start: Sun Aug 06 19:39:43 2006
Session Ident: #ffshrine
Now talking in #ffshrine
Topic is ‘Sex with Chocobo’s
Set by Sarah on Sat Aug 05 05:50:02
———————————————————-

Cloud> could you die if you had sex with a Chocobo?
Tidus> you could get HIV
Tidus> But it’s worth taking that risk.
Cloud> hmmm, we should hand out free condoms to Chocobo
Tifa> To please a Chocobo. <3
Wakka> :/
Cloud> The bible doesn’t mention that it’s ‘bad’ to have sex with a Chocobo
Vincent> Yuna broke the noose, apparently…
Sephiroth> im pretty sure it does, Cloud.
Cloud> where?
Sephiroth> leviticus
Sephiroth> says you’ll be RITUALLY UNCLEAN
Sephiroth> i think that is probably bad
Yuna> OH MY GOD THE BIBLE COMES UP A LOT FOR A ROOM FULL OF FAGS
Cloud> lool
Chocobo has joined #ffshrine
Sephiroth> haha
Sephiroth> YOU CAN BE a FAG AND A CHRISTIAN
Yuna> That’s called a self-hating fag
Barret has left #ffshrine
Sephiroth> god knows why you would want to be the latter though LOL
Sephiroth> TAKE THAT CHRISTIANITY
Yuna> Seriously
Cloud> oeeh Leviticus is writen by Mozes. That guy’s so funny
Sephiroth> was it?
Sephiroth> leviticus is batshit insane

Barret: "Yo Sephiroth! You lose! I have the black materia! Hahaha!"
Sephiroth: "What on Earth are you talking about? I have the black materia."
Aeris: "Um… Barret? What you’re holding isn’t the black materia, it’s chocobo shit."

At Bevelle,

Yuna:This sphere thing is fuckin shit.Let’s try something.
Rikku:Masturbating sausages, uhh can we Yunie?
Paine:What is this cunting bullshit?
Baralai:Praise be to Yevon

I think we should have a "things ffs members would never say" it’d be alot more interesting and alot less repetetive.

yeah, i love redbat

Any FF character, but special application to the FF7 cast, Sephiroth in particular:

"MY FANDOM IS FILLED WITH F*CKING GENIUSES!!! THEY’RE F*CKING BRILLIANT! NO, SRSLY!! I LOVE MY FANDOM!!"

Cloud: Oh my fucking god Aries is dead! noooooooooooooooooooo

Sepiroth: USE A FUCKING PHEONIX DOWN YOU CUM STAIN!

Tidus: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh I LOVE THE MOOGLES RAWR LUNCH TIME! CHOCO COCK HERE I CUM!

Squall: Can i wiggle my toe without a fucking battle??? FUCK OFF PLEASE!

Cloud: Man Tifa your boobs are big.
Tifa: You pervert!!
Barret: Half of it is padding.
Tifa: Barret!
Yuffie: He’s right*while searching under her top* can I use some?

Hehe

Cecil: Rosa, I need a word with you
Rosa: what?
Cecil:ur a..
Kain:Person… that, is …. ummmm ahhhh
Rosa: You, Kain Suck
Kain: aahhh that hurt my feelings! *sobs*
Cecil:… and thats what you are.
Rosa: sorry i didnt hear you because Kain Was crying.
Cecil:Noooo! another Sober!

Cecil Hits Kain With his Sword of legand,
Does 9999,9999,9999,9999,9999,9999,9999,9999,9999 Damage
Kain has 1 hp left
Cecil taps him Does 1 damage
Kain Dies
Cecil: No more babies today!
Rosa: Did you really have to kill him?
Cecil: you know TO MUCH!
Cecil Attacks Rosa does 3 Damage
Rosa Falls over Damaged 9999 Damage
Cecil picks up Rosa and throws her in The Zeromus Battle and Rosa has only 150 hp.

FIN