eternal



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shade17
11-10-2005, 10:09 PM
somebody rate this out of ten…

eternal.

life into me flow and breathe,
rest your head on my lap,
and cry,
cry for the children,
the homeless and poor,
cry for the people,
remembered no more,
trust in eternity,
put your faith in me,
your sword in my hand,
i’ll fight for the troubled in this eternal land.
………………………………………….. ………………………………………….. ….

i just did this to see if anyone likes my poetry. please rate it.


Gentleman Ghost
11-11-2005, 01:41 AM
Prak, Where you at?
Come here, show me what you think,
Of this whack piece-O-crap,
jus playin’

very col…


Neo Xzhan
11-11-2005, 01:58 AM
I like poetry, yes. But this is just an insult to all poets.

IceAngel100
11-11-2005, 05:26 PM
This is just a very wierd poem…

Blank101
11-11-2005, 05:46 PM
i thought it was fucking brilliant. know show some respect

bitches


IceAngel100
11-12-2005, 03:08 PM
i thought it was fucking brilliant. know show some respect

bitches

That realy isn’t nice. People have their own tastes, and you shouldn’t mouth them off for voicing how they feel on a poem. You could say you thought the poem was good ect. but calling people bitches is just mean…


Neo Xzhan
11-12-2005, 04:55 PM
Right, the first sentance of the poem makes no senes or what so ever, there is no flow, there’s no central thought behind it.

There’s one good thing about it, so far I can’t see spelling errors.

And I show respect where it belongs, this is just a poor poem.


Dragoncurry
11-12-2005, 11:14 PM
Why is YOUR sword in my hand? Where is MY sword?

MossY
11-12-2005, 11:37 PM
i thought it was fucking brilliant. know show some respect

bitches
Are you the bastard who voted ten?


Blank101
11-12-2005, 11:59 PM
do you want a fight!

MossY
11-13-2005, 12:02 AM
Yeah, because empty threats made over the internet aren’t pathetic.

Blank101
11-14-2005, 05:47 PM
do YOU want a fight

April
11-14-2005, 09:07 PM
Blank – shut up

People – stop annoying him.

np~


Blank101
11-18-2005, 06:01 PM
im sorry

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