Why in the world do random monsters wander around with Gil and wepons/items?
Because every time someone loses the game, the monster that ate them gets gil and items stuck in its teeth.
Why doesn't anyone bleed?
They do, you silly person.
Come of it, what exactly does "Gil" look like?
Rice.
Why's it called "Gil"
The same reason that shoes are called shoes. Someone named it that.
Why haven't the people of FFX devoloped nukes and lanched an all-out assault on Sin?
Because splitting pixels doesn't unleash nearly as much energy as splitting atoms.
Do those people at the very least get the irony in the name "Sin?"
Considering that they named it, I'd wager that the answer is yes.
1. Why does Jenova always throw bits of itself at you when you fight it?
Making the most of Leprosy.
2. Why do enemies (eg. blobs of goo) have money?
Already answered.
3. How does the members of your team keep their money when you hae like 4,553,924,924 gil?
As previously mentioned, Gil is nothing more than rice. The characters eat it to store it. Of course, that makes spending it more than a little gross.
4. Why are the majority of main characters in the FF games mainly wierdos/loners?
In order to relate to the players, of course.
5. How does T-Rexaur hide in the Balamb forests when he is blatently taller than the trees?
Already answered. Sorta.
6. Why are the main characters like taller than the buildings on the world map, but when you enter the town they are normal size?
FF worlds come with a convenient travel-size feature that lets characters shrink their environment to cross it more easily. Some of the newer models are also equipped with OnStar.
7. Why the hell is the inn in Wutai called the Turtle Paradise? What type of paradise can it be with a turtle???
Ask a turtle.
8. Why does Barret have a weapon called Cannonball when he doesnt shoot it, he just hits them with it?
Well, a cannonball can't be fired without a cannon, so hitting someone with it is about the only option.
9. And why does he have a weapon called Atomic Scissors? Is he going to cut the enemies' hair or something?
Well, it worked for Bugs Bunny. (
)
10. What hair gel does Cloud use to keep his hair like that?
It isn't hair. It's a strange plastic hat.
11. What else does Quistis use her whip for?
Well, that's obvious... jumping rope.
You were thinking it was something dirty, weren't you?
12. And why is she the King of cards?
Ask Sarah to explain it to you.
14. Why was there a porn mag lying in the hallway of Timber Maniacs?
Little Jimmy always misplaces his things. If you give it to his mother, I'm sure she'd be happy to return it to him.
15. Why was Zell allowed to stay at Balamb Garden with a massive tattoo across his face?
Cid drew it on him last time they played dress-up.
16. Why is Squall so sad he NAMED his necklace/ring lion thing?
So you think everyone who names an inanimate object is sad? That's really sad.
17. How comes Zidane has a tail?
Well, when two people love each other very much, they...
18. Why has Eiko got her **** showing?
**** = hair? Not many people cover that.
19. What idiot screwed up the translating of Aeris/Aerith?
Sylvester Stallone.
20. Finally, why are there so many CRAP sites dedicated to FF series?
Because there are so many CRAP fans of the FF series.
What do monsters do during the time that passes when idiot gamers decide their move in FFX?
Play Parcheesi.
How come a whole bloody army of Al Bhed and their giant cannons and all the chocobo knights are weaker than a single summoner and a ragtag crew of guardians.
That's what an army gets for attacking on April Fools Day, when half of them have Kick Me signs on their back, the chocobos have been fed Ex-Lax, and the cannonballs have been replaced with kumquats.
What do the party members that are not in battle do while their comrades fight?
Play Parcheesi with the monsters.
do any of the chars believe in god?...
No, they're all atheists. And they're all wrong, so they'll all be going to hell, while the religious villains laugh at them from heaven.
do STDS exist?
yes
and if so who has some?
The mother of every FF character had an STD for about 9 months. The condition always cures itself after that time.
Why do your characters dissapear when you call a summon in FF7?
Because they run away like little bitches. What you see fading is an after-image. If you look closely enough, you can sometimes see the trail of dust going over the horizon
what is setheroth parents name's he's moms and dads.
Oh my. A bit of muck found its way into your gene pool, I fear. I recommend that it be drained, scrubbed, sanitized, filled with cement, dug up, and dropped into the Pacific.
Ha ha ha ha, i am the true master that is all i play besides halo and halo2.
Congratulations on being the kind of stupid freak I'm making fun of.