I was naked with a lit cigarette. Don't ask why, but my koscher sausage is now overcooked...

Happens every day. Why make a thread about it?

Oh dear... are you brothers with this guy (http://www.rawstory.com/2016/03/georgia-man-loses-his-leg-after-shooting-lawnmower-packed-with-explosive/?utm_source=fark&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=im&utm_tracker=1737131x84899)? You both have similar hobbies of hurting yourselves in silly ways.

It was accidental, I totally cried though.

Another Pointless Thread. What a Surprise.

It was accidental, I totally cried though.

If you don't want your penis to burn again, with your hand additionally, you should never ever masturbate.

That's a sin. It's a devil's doing.

If it was, God would've punished me by now. :laugh:

Every time I masturbate, God kills a whale. It could explain why they're endangered.

http://i.imgur.com/Eqmql.gif
hot

http://i.imgur.com/Eqmql.gif
hot

That hurt my own man jewels

Every time I masturbate, God kills a whale. It could explain why they're endangered.

If you masturbate as much as A WILD SNORLAX APPEARS, Whales would be extinct.

If you masturbate as much as A WILD SNORLAX APPEARS, Whales would be extinct.

Don't forget Shad. Just because he disguises it with weird names doesn't mean it's not jerking it, at the end of the day.

I Pity these people.

I was naked with a lit cigarette. Don't ask why, but my koscher sausage is now overcooked...

Why were you smoking imo

You're lucky that all that got burned was your dick, Ricky... ever hear of the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory?

Why were you smoking imo

Because smoking makes me cool! DUH!

oh, right

smoking naked must make you cool AND a bad ass. Billy Idol shit.

With a rebel yell!

I was naked with a lit cigarette. Don't ask why, but my koscher sausage is now overcooked...

pics4proof

I'm not uploading my schmack online. Especially when there's no monetary gain from it.

This is not a funny thread.

perhaps it was meant as a cautionary tale, I, for one, will think thrice before purchasing cigs and smoking them whilst naked.

---------- Post added at 04:48 AM ---------- Previous post was at 04:41 AM ----------

You should make your campaign poster your signature, as I did. Let people know you are running for Administrator.

George! 2016

idk Tate, I think I like the strategy of just posting it randomly after I make political statements... world peace.

You did not make a political statement though... :p

You just did now, but not before.

Really, all you have to do, is just say "911" or "world peace" and people will go crazy. :laugh:

smoking naked must make you cool AND a bad ass. Billy Idol shit.

I wonder if Billy Idol ever burnt his own dick with a cig...

*whoosh* "Whoops!"

:laugh:

perhaps it was meant as a cautionary tale, I, for one, will think thrice before purchasing cigs and smoking them whilst naked.

---------- Post added at 04:48 AM ---------- Previous post was at 04:41 AM ----------



wouldnt want to burn your dick

mir

wouldnt want to burn your dick

mir

Or my lady bits

Seeing Clonemaster and Clownmaster in the same thread is like seeing yin and yang coming together...

Everything is in balance...

---------- Post added at 10:06 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:04 PM ----------


Or my lady bits

You've got evolutionary advantage, you can probably smoke naked without worry, lucky

The world is at peace...

do the women you guys know not have things that protrude out from their chest ?_?

Uh... I don't think I've ever seen any without.

At least I don't know anyone without.

do the women you guys know not have things that protrude out from their chest ?_?

I've seen women and I've seen cigarettes, and I've seen women with cigarettes, and boobs never seemed to stop them. I guess nicotine is just that strong of a force.

You've got evolutionary advantage, you can probably smoke naked without worry, lucky


do the women you guys know not have things that protrude out from their chest ?_?

they're prty hazardous imo.

I did that once was a bad feeling. I know your pain brother, keep rubbing help the healing process.

do the women you guys know not have things that protrude out from their chest ?_?

laz0rz?

laz0rz?

fembot.

pew pew pew

Has anyone ever masturbated with something flammable?

Has anyone ever masturbated with something flammable?

I don't know why you would ever bring anything else into it except your hands and you know what.

I don't know why you would ever bring anything else into it except your hands and you know what.

huh

huh

-mmus. Huhmmus.

Has anyone ever masturbated with something flammable?

I plead the fifth.

I plead the fifth.

Bourbon? Whiskey? Scotch? Probably explains penis flamb�.

Look on the bright side: an inability to procreate means you won't pass your genetic idiocy to future generations. Your seed dies with you.

And there was much rejoicing in the land.

I once stapled mine to a horse.

I once stapled mine to a horse.

that's just practical, what with all the horse theives.

why is this thread still a thing

why is it not closed?

A scientific presentation of the answer to the question is appreciated also.

I mean, wasn't Clownmaster closing stupid threads

Why the fuck isn't this one closed if it's stupid and useless?

Favoritism much?

I mean, wasn't Clownmaster closing stupid threads

Why the fuck isn't this one closed if it's stupid and useless?

Favoritism much?

Mostly I closed threads that were similar

Mostly I closed threads that were similar

no you closed whatever you felt was stupid or unnecesary, to your own view

but no fuzz

Looks like Ponyo's gettin' salty :parrot:

I mean, wasn't Clownmaster closing stupid threads

Why the fuck isn't this one closed if it's stupid and useless?

Favoritism much?
my threads were closed too and he probably likes me more than he likes you

Looks like Ponyo's gettin' salty :parrot:

Well, I do need salt with my fries, don't I? :laugh:

okay I knew I was gonna cause fuzz but I wasn't really being serious, you guys really expect me to give a huge fuss if this thread is closed or not? xD

Yup

Wup?!

If you can withstand two minutes in the toaster, you deserve the marmalade.

---------- Post added at 02:17 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:15 PM ----------


that's just practical, what with all the horse theives.

Practical? There was such a high demand at that point, I had to hire an armed escort to the ER.

you guys really expect me to give a huge fuss if this thread is closed or not? xD


Yup

Yeah

I was trying to share the pain of my newly blackened schmack amongst friends. That's what I get for taking advice from Odin...

Still don't know who Odin is. :p

Still don't know who Odin is. :p

An interesting fellow with a severe case of broke dick and gun fever.

FFS rule #1, never take advice from Odin unless it's how not to use a peen.

That's what I get for taking advice from Odin...


FFS rule #1, never take advice from Odin unless it's how not to use a peen.

https://38.media.tumblr.com/70a6c338ca74f765af55dd75bbbdca8e/tumblr_inline_o2u1tqw06t1rup3xb_500.gif

You had to be there, man...

I am super glad this thread is here because I haven't burnt any genitals, but my nail on my middle finger is coming off because I accidentally slammed it in my door ;-;

Thanks for creating this thread so I would have a safe place to talk about my disgusting finger.

I'm hoping you'll still be able to salute to the president.

In case of...

I'm hoping you'll still be able to salute to the president.

:colbert: