I know this is an odd place to post such stuff but where else can I find people to talk to? FFshrine Forums have been a great help in craving my appetite for music. After all these years, I've come to find out I'm using music to feed myself instead of facing reality. But recently something happened and no music was able to tide me over.

This may sound pathetic but its a post from a young person who is still confused about what is love and the purpose of life.

So allow me to begin with what happened.

I enrolled into a university and I met this girl (Let's call her Strawberry) who has always been such an eye catcher. Somehow just somehow I always manage to catch the sight of her with her bright pink jacket.
Every time I see her, it brings out the smile in me. (Not that I am a grumpy guy or anything) So she lives at the same dorm as I am and she lives two floors below me. (I'm not a stalker, somehow I got to know her roommate, Pineapple. I have a weird choice of names but yea)

After 2 months I finally got the chance to speak to Strawberry. Her roommate invited me and Strawberry out for a cup of coffee and we got to know each other better. We talked till late night and Pineapple had other friends to attend to, so I walked back with Strawberry because she felt tired. When we got back to the dorm she asked me to sit awhile and she wanted to talk to me, so we ended up talking till the next morning about her life, about the tragedy that happened to her sister. She said talking to me was like no other because I paid full attention to her while she was speaking, and yes because I was really into her. During finals period, she was always tensed and worried about finals and she misses breakfast which I;m worried about. Throughout her finals week I gave her moral support and of course buying breakfast and sometimes made breakfast for her to serve her in front of her room.

Winter term came and we had different math classes but it was at the same time in the same building. I walked with her more frequently now and we got closer. I helped her out in many ways, applying for scholarship, adding and dropping classes, followed her to her adviser's appointment (all because she asked me if I wanted to tag along), so I went with it. We would always have dinner every night (with Pineapple too) and we just had that time to "bond". Everything was going well and we even constantly cook together and to eat together. I would also help her in her math because she was uncertain and weak in maths. Many things happened this term and of course with new terms come new people.

A new guy (Apple) came into her life after finals for Winter Term. He cooks and I think he looks better than me. They would have physical touches between each other, share the same couch while watching TV and lots more. She knew him for maybe two weeks and you can see them always hitting each other (in that nice sweet way). She knew me for 6 months now, I'm always trying my best to be nice to her and all I get is being poked at my arms, and it was only twice. (I literally counted because it meant a lot to me)

So everything happened this morning, she asked me whether we wanted to make breakfast. I went down to find her alone, (because she's always with her roommate, Pineapple) So I was shocked but yea it made me happy for a while. We made breakfast and she would bring up the spoon for me to taste and I would do the same back. So after preparing breakfast, we went out to the TV lounge to eat while watching TV. Suddenly this guy (Apple) came and shared the sofa with her, they got really comfy which kinda disgusted me. They would hit each other and role around on the sofa together. I was heartbroken and I just left them because I was too disgusted to be there. Am I just a toy to play around? Is this a game?

I invested too much of my time on a beautiful vase and it broke today...

Any comments or opinion is more than welcome

You messed up on the romantic bit. You went for the friends angle and that's what you are now...Just friends. All is not lost though, persistance may win out. Something else you might is to put some space between the two of you for a while.

If you haven't expressed romantic interests, after the amount of time that has passed, she may not believe said interests to exist... She may have suspected you liked her that way, but those suspicions may have abated. She may have friendzoned you, but she came by it honestly. Just ask yourself, do you still want her after she bangs that guy, because that's where it's heading and there's nothing you can do about it, especially if you really love her.

How should she even know about your feelings?
If you cannot find a way to express yourself, either writing or talking, you should get used to being a friend.... Nothing else.

How should she even know about your feelings?
If you cannot find a way to express yourself, either writing or talking, you should get used to being a friend.... Nothing else.

This. Pardon my English, but if you still want her, you should by all means tell her how you feel, just like that, honestly and without holding anything back. You have nothing to lose, really - should she return your feelings, great! If not, and should she still go to be with that jerk, be a man and let her go with dignity and calm, don't make any scenes, don't beg her to leave him and be with you, just wish them luck and stay cool; because if she chooses him over you, even after your "declaration of feelings", she was never worth the effort anyway.

i disagree with the "she was never worth the effort then" part, respectfully.

She might well have been worth the effort. A person is not only worth the effort under the condtion he/she gives the desired feedback?

Maybe it was a bit harsh, I admit, but I didn't mean anything disrespectful by that, I was just trying to make the poor man feel better in case she rejects him and his feelings in favor of that other guy. Maybe if he thinks of her in that way, it will help him get through all that. Do you think a male-female friendship is possible (or even healthy) after one side declares it wants more than that? I'm asking out of curiosity, I don't want to provoke any argument here (plus, I think danielgwj should answer himself the very same question - if he'll be able to keep her as a friend and watch their relationship without any discomfort; mind you, I'm not advising him to completely break off with her, but from my own humble experience I know that situations like that, those "emotional threesomes", are never easy).

....agreed, that might be difficult (no matter the genders involved)
And yes, I understand.

it is something one might think possible (I can be "just" a friend, yes I can do that) only to find out, after a while of experience, it is too painfull.
OR: impossible for her, knowing he feels so very differently, maybe.
On the other hand, it IS possible. (but sadly not that often)

Yet I do think it is worth the risc of trying to find out. As, in later years, it is mostly the things we were afraid to find out, we tend to regret not having tried afterwards.

I'm glad you understand - after all, we're all trying to help, right? And I guess there's not much more we can do; now it's up to danielgwj to decide on a best course of action. But I agree, he should at least try to be her friend (should she reject him, which I still hope she won't) and to cope with her relationship with that other guy. It won't be easy, being a man turned into basically another girlfriend never is, but as you said, it's worth trying. Time will tell what will happen, as always. Daniel, best of luck, man! And don't forget to let us know how it all went.

Put some distance between the two of you. I wouldn't necessarily make her think you dislike her, but being around less may get her to realize something's up. Or that she misses you. She can't miss you if you're always there, and the "strangely close guy friend" role may have convinced her that you do not see her in that way (as others have said, how could she know of your feelings?)

Keep in mind, the close guy friend role works best when it's over a length of time, in my experience, years. So she's kind of with a guy, and you don't like it. So what? Is there clear indication that they will have a relationship? Perhaps he's just another close guy friend, or perhaps she is just very friendly and open with alot of guys; some girls are like that, and it can lead to some incorrect assumptions simply because you haven't seen her interact with very many other guy friends. Back to the main point, even if they do start a relationship, it won't necessarily last. Perhaps the fallout from that will help you bond further, or perhaps you simply being in her life as a close friend for a length of time will eventually get her to realize she sees you in that way. Personally, being a close friend for a year or two has led to a couple of long term relationships, so the method does work so long as she has some slight attraction to you.

TL;DR Be around less. Don't make her think you hate her...but develop a tendency to be around a little less. Especially when Apple is around. See if she notices, and how she responds, that will tell you if your ship has sunk. Remember, you have to always leave the crowd wanting more.

It's funny how you guys replied 4 months later..haha thanks for all the replies, I really appreciate all your views on this matter, and of course what should I do, I had a summer vacation and returned to find out she has a new boyfriend now. I'm not really bothered anymore, guess I finally moved on.

Thank all of you again!