Iron Man 3.
Huge p.o.s.
But I enjoyed the last half hour...
because of (spoiler details hidden inside)
after the, quote/unquote, Mandarin was revealed to be an actor.
then later revealed in Killian's final 3 seconds of existence that he was the Mandarin all along.
http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyffkgHDX81qm68ago1_400.gif
*slowest f&%king clap ever*
:laugh: No really, though. I did like that huge, quote/unquote, twist going on.
First there's a Mandarin, then there isn't. THEN THERE IS!
Kingsly's rant about "He's here, but he's not here, he's here..." was almost entirely accurate (had they not revealed that the actor didn't know everything and just made him look like a looney that did indeed know everything).
Ben Kingsly was astounding, however. In both roles.
I loved him as the villainous portrayal of the Mandarin.
And loved him even more as the drunk junkie.
He really did save the first whole 90 minutes of the film.
Jon Favreu just sucks $hit.
I remember when I first heard that he's not directing it was because he "wanted to focus more on his character"...
which only had 30 seconds screen time.
Okay, huge exaggeration. But his first two films had more screen time.
I didn't follow up on why bowed out. Maybe he heard his fans say he sucked at making 1&2?
I hear a lot of criticism over the first two. And now this one.
I don't mind 1 but like 2 better.
This one I can see.
So many "few moments of glory" in this.
Stark's "anxiety" is fakest shit I've ever seen.
The whole movie (and presumably the time between the end of The Avengers to the start of IM3) Tony is freaking out.
The diner scene was pretty damn good.
But after that, all it took was a kid to tell him something opaque and generic... "You're a mechanic; so make something."
Tony: "Okay" *cured*
HE'S BEEN MAKING 42 SUITS SINCE THE AVENGERS!
His dependence on the child is overly abused.
"Father figure", "role model"...don't give me that shit.
Tony's had everything figured out. Even with his "anxiety". He's designed suits to pull him out of debris as if he just hired Thing from Addam's Family and gave Thing a suit of armor!
Naturally, Stark would be able to simply come up with the Nickolodean Suite all by himself.
"The all new Mark 1000." (written in Crayola Crayons.)
Now let's talk about the stupid little kid who's parentless and "connected" yet a mechanical genius.
1) "Freeze"
2) "Is that Iron Man?"
2a) Stark "Technically, I'm Iron Man."
3) "Technically, you're dead." (implies that he knew who he was the whole time and decided to be a dumb little shit and play games. Stark's fucking picture was clearly on the cover for the audience to see.)
So even after the kid tries to pick up Tony Stark as a new father (of which the mother would completely have no idea what the hell is going on. Where is she by the way? Doesn't care that her garage just blew up to smithereens?), all Stark does is return a "limited edition" watch and handful of expensive shit his mother is probably going to pawn off for booze. Or hell, she might even run with all the money to "go get some scratchers".
Nice, Tony. Leave a distraught family. GET THAT KID A HOME WITH SOME EDUCATION!
He probably doesn't even have a sister.
Did his whole fucking family go get scratchers??? o_O
I laughed so many times throughout the movie.
Not because it was funny.
Because it was ridiculously stupid!
"I can't believe they just did that."
The airplane scene is where the movie picked up and I actually enjoyed it and criticized it much less.
But I can't help but feel that I wouldn't have enjoyed that part (and thereon) without having to suffer the first part of the movie.
I really loved it when the falling victims actually gave a shit about each other and helped.
I was half-expecting one of the flight crew to be David Strathairn and punch someone or kick them away so he can save himself.
Brian Tyler's score was very riveting. I was on the edge of my seat when Stark was saving the flight crew.
I actually cheered at when they landed safely in the water.
You have no idea how ecstatic I was at that part...
Last tidbit that ruined the film for me:
Killian getting all Godzilla on Rhodes.
Don't get me wrong, I love Guy Pearce. I think he was a sexy villain but even that was too much.
I did laugh at Pepper using her atomic dildo to kill Killian.
But that didn't ruin it so much for me.
I knew it was Stark's dildo the whole time.
