Safety discussion thread

I have searched on all of the following 9
YouTube
wikiHow
eHow
Google search engine
Ask search engine
Blekko search engine
Bing search engine
Yahoo search engine
AOL search engine
about leaving an abusive relationship safely
and watched both of nigella4me’s youtube videos
on how to get out of an abusive relationship safely.

I still want to ask though: How do I teach someone to safely leave an abusive relationship please? Thank You.

… there is no "safe" way, of course, i doubt there is something like that for most things…

so, there is no way of teaching to leave safely, in my opinion.

Do you want to teach this in general, to many people, or to someone specific that you might be related to or befriended with?
If in general, knowledge in certain areas will be needed, psychology, communication etc.
If the latter, beware. Your possibilities are limited. Otherwise you might find yourself in a drama triangle soon enough.

it’s never anything that easy as you might want it to be.

You can read so many poems, books, literature and even watch the finest movies on this subject, no matter how little or great their recognition.

It’s just something each person learns their own.
Even then, it’s not going to be easy or something you’ve seen in a poem, book or movie.

It’s an immensely personal experience.
You can read annectdotes from so many people but never feel it’s appropriate to you.
Conversely, you may feel it is appropriate when it really isn’t.

All I can say is from experience, and by that: trying to tell others or watching others tell their loved ones.

The first time, second time, or even the tenth time is not going to be the time that convinces them.
Even if you understand the minor moments that that person feels in the abusive person, the complete connection is lost to you since are not the primary recipient of those collected experiences.

We live largely on memories and feelings.
It’s our feelings that make a memory something worth keeping or wanting to eliminate entirely.

And, when you eliminate a memory, you risk losing the good memories.
And, from what I gather from most humans, the good memories is what really accounts for whatever insane notion they have that drives their actions.

Your insane action has to equal or surpass their insane action.
And the only thing I’ve seen that surpasses human emotion is human logic.

Human logic doesn’t happen in an instant, nor over night.
You will have to be patient.

But, whatever happens, you must show that out of all the insane options, you are the only constant in their life to sure about something logical.
To express that, you have to practice saying that.
Your initial reactions are not going to be convincing, especially if you have to google or ask for help.

You’ve watched this pattern long enough to know what to say.
Now you just have to be patient to know when to say it.
And, trust me, your first 5 times will not be the appropriate time to say it.

I’ve seen it in so many people, they always feel the first time to say it is the time to say it.
It takes more than one time to say it.
It takes more than one explaination prove it.

You have to remember: it’s not just you; it’s them as well.

Memory is both good and bad.
You just have to learn which is more appropriate.
And, that takes a lifetime.
So you have to prove you have the lifetime to prove it.
You have multiple lifetimes to prove it.

You must prove you have what it takes what dreams may come.