My first fantasy novel

So as a prequel to what my book is about… As a kid I came up with a great idea for an MMORPG and I named it Drylor. As I grew up I realized that was a pipe dream, so I decided to use the binders of information and maps I made for the world of Drylor for a book, 9 books in fact. This is the start of a new legacy.

It�s not a short story but an actual novel that I wrote myself. It is about a man that suffers amnesia and struggles to regain his memory throughout the story. As he does, he realizes that his brother has become corrupted and is on team Jacob, which of course he just can�t stand for since he loves Edward. (No, really I�m just kidding)

Back to being serious, Throughout the book, the main character, Von slowly gathers his memory back and makes it his mission in life to end his brother�s heartless massacres and stop him from destroying the world of Drylor.

If I have perked your interests here is what the back of the book says and also a picture of the front cover!

http://almarsguides.com/Almar‘s%20Stuff/Drylor.jpg

When a man wakes up inside a cage that is being carried through
an underground city, he has no idea where he is or what has
happened to him. As Von, a victim of amnesia, is taken to a jail
cell to await his fate amongst elves, humans, dwarfs, gnomes, and
halflings, he is told he is a member of the Royal Guard of Genisus.
It is not long before he is transported to the palace where he
meets an impatient king who eventually returns him to his jail
cell while deciding his destiny.

As Von�s memory slowly returns, he discovers that he is the only
one who can protect Drylor�a world that abandoned him�
from its greatest evil, his own brother. Through his journey to the
truth, Von meets an unlikely group of friends who are willing
to sacrifice everything to help him stop his brother Scarlet
from annihilating the only world they have ever known.

As Von�s past becomes clear and reveals his future, he soon
realizes the only way he can end his brother�s heartless
massacres is to find him and kill him.

What do you guys think? Does it sound interesting to you, if you picked it up in a store, read the back and seen the cover would you be more prone to buying it or would you just put it back down?

The cover looks like it’s going in the right direction, I can’t tell if it’s the design or the compression, but the lines look pretty abrasive. If it were cleaned up, the minimalist design would catch my eye. However, upon reading the line ‘Victim of amnesia’, I wouldn’t put it back, I’d just drop it. On the floor, right there. If a plot or a story uses amnesia to carry it a long, I lose interest, immediately.

I’m not saying it’s bad, if it’s presented in the right way, the amnesia part of the story, I wouldn’t be against it, but if I read the line ‘a victim of amnesia’, I’d make a face somewhere between FUUUUUUUUUU and disgust.

Props on writing a novel, though. It takes a lot of stick-to-it-iveness and confidence in what you’re doing to finish up an entire freakin’ novel. No matter what you think of it, worse has been published. If I were you, I wouldn’t be shy about shopping it around to publishers.

I read your post on another forum Nodose…

It does sound promising, but you need to find a way to make it stand out from the plethora of other fantasy novels. My one criticism, is that ‘Von’ sounds a lot like ‘Kaim Argonar’, the lead protagonist in the game ‘Lost Odyssey’… regarding the whole amnesia, and then journeying to rediscover himself etc etc. ‘Scarlet’ so far, sounds like a rendition of ‘Kefla’ from FFVI to me…

Congratz on writing a novel though, as that’s something I hope to do myself (atm, just writing fanfics… and some original fiction) but be warned: the Critics will roast it, if you don’t do something to make it grab a reader’s interest from the get go as well as keep them hooked from start to finish.

Very cool!