OK this is my first fanfic ever, I love Final Fantasy! I am Dyslexic so b kind if my disroder efects my gramma.

Hi my name is Cloud Darkness Strife. I live in Nibelhim with Tiga Lockhart ned i am a vampire. I have been a vampire ever since i could remember, i was adopted at birth so i will neva no my tru parents. As you are reading this I open my pale red eyes into the darkness of the sky and shake off my long, spiky blonde hair. I am wearing a long black cloak with a purple and red trim and a pic of Marilyn Manson on da back. I was wearin a tight leather jeans and fingerless gloves lyk Hayley William frum Paramore. In case you culdnt tell I am a Goth and I love goffik music. I smiled a vampire smile and tuk out my swod, which was long and thick and very sharp. I put my swod on my shuldert and stepped outside into the night...

Suddenly who came but Tida!!! �Hi Cloud� she scremed softly. I was effervesced by her calm demenor. She was weran a black fishnet tights wif black boots and a black top dat sed GG Allin on da frunt. Tiga was also a vampir, and lik me she never new her real parents cos they dies in a car crash. �Well, see you later� she smelled statistically. She flew by wif her raven black hair.

END OF CHAPTER 1. I will make arrangmenets for the next chapter :) BE PATIENT OK FUCK U

I love it when girls smell statistically.

Mmmmm, confidence intervals.

OK lol I culdnt stup writin thx for the crit so far :) Dis is CHAPTER 2 I hop u like also STOP ASKING FOR MORE IT WILL BE DUN WHEN IT IS DUN >.>

It was nigttime and I was sitting over the water in nibelhim. I was sad so a single depres red tear fel from my eyelid and i slit my writs (AN: vampire cry tears of blud because of the curse of the souls of there victims). I was so depressd. Why did I fel this way? I reched over my sword when suddenly some1 came!

Hi my name is Yuffie Sally Kuro Kiragi. Kuro is jpanaese for Black which is suitable bcos I am a Japanese Goth. One day I was promenading around Nibelhim. I woz wearin black hotpants wif pink fishnet tights and matching fishnets on my arms. I wor a t shirt that said Avril Lavigne on da back and my hair was black wif pink highlights and i wore it in kind of a messy bun. I wore lotsa eyeliner and my forrest green eyes stared in2 da nite. Suddenly I saw Cloud on the water. “You luk kawai,” I comted haply.

“Wut does that mean?” Cloud said confus.

“I sed Kawaii, its japanaes for Cute and i am japanaes so it sips in2 conversation sometimes.” I sed casurly, shaking back my messi black hair.

“oh ok” I said back. (AN: Clouds point of view again) I waved my swod in the air sadly. It made me happy to se Yuffie, but what about Tiga???

END OF CHAPTER 2 I hope u like it :)

Yuffie Sally Kuro Kiragi

Thx I named her from the Japanese (I did reserch, luk it up ffs) and afta Sally from DAS NITmare b4 xMAS

Here is Tiga Lockheart for people that are having trouble picturing her....



Yeaaahh....

:O DAT IS SO KIEWL draw Yuffie now :D btw u spelt tiga wrong

So did you, brotha~

Now Cloud Darkness Strife:




double yeeaaahhh.....

Here is Tiga Lockheart for people that are having trouble picturing her....



Yeaaahh....

Nah man I think he means like this


Damn I cannot top Cloud fucking Darkness Strife!!

and last but not least Yuffie Sally Kuro Kiragi (Sorry Agent):



triple yeeahhh....

Wow. I must say, this is a pretty awesome thread!

I love your sense of character development, and general organization of a story. Primo stuff man.


--Cool story bro.

OMG dese r so kewl! next part coming up 2nite :) thx every1 for the kl commets btw were is mi swteet???

OK next chapta

1 day it was rainin limpid tears when suddenly an ugly preppy man wif blond hair appeard. It was…. Vicent Valen! He was now a prep and wore a pink t shirt dat red Hilary Duff on da frunt. His name is now Lindsay. I could applicate his beuaty (I’m bisezul) but I did not lyk his preppu clothing.

“Hi” sed Lindsay

“”Hi” I sed”go away Lindsay u r too prepu now”

“I am 2 gooffix!” said Linday sadly deprssdly. I was so fucken angry. “Anyway da dark lod wants 2 see u”

“Yeh I bet u don’t even no what Good Charlotte is. I cant beliv u are best frends wiv Sephirot now u betrayer” I said energcly lethragecly. (AN: see we handel dep emotun)

“SILENCE YOU RIDICULOUS DONDERHED” scremed Sephirot suddenly. He wore a long preppy hair wif a long pink rob. His swod was long and think. I couldn’t believe it, I was so deprezzing. “ Thou art a fool! Thou must kill Yufie and Tiga!”

“And what if I don’t” I scremed. I cried a singul depressed tear of blud.

“If thou doth not kill them,” Said Sephirot Preppily “Then I shal killt thou neway!”

“NO!” I sed depres. I hit my swod at him but he had disappeared! “CUM BAK AND FITE!” I sed murmerdly.

“I am sorry Cloud” said Lindsay somberly confus “ The drak lod speaks the truth.”

“U FUKEN PREPZ! MY LYF IS OVA!” I yelld. Den I went.

NED OF CHAPTER 3 sorry if I spelt some words wrong im typin on notpad and IM TIRED OK SO FUCK U?

OK chapter 4 im sorry for the double post >.> IF YOU COMTED MORE I WULDNT HAVE TO btw where is my swtet?

I went to my room. I was so depress after seeing Sepipot that I slit my wrirts and drank the blood. Then I put a steak through my heart. Suddenly I felt beter so I got dresd. I put on a tight black T shirt wif a pic of Gerard Way on da frunt and dark red jeans. I wore matching black wrirtbands and a silver locket in the shape of a borken heart. My eyes which change color in the daytym were bright blu. Den I went.

“Oh hey” said some1. It was Tida. “Are you coming to band practic?”

“Of course” I sed casully. “Is Yuffie going?”

“Um I tink so.” Tifa said confusly transcendent. “Why do u want 2 no?”

“Oh nothing” I said briefly. Den I felt guilty so we made out. “Come on lets go to pratice.”

Our band is called Scarlet Golgotha 666. I sing led and play gitar exactly like Billy Joe Armstrong. Yuffie and Tiga r also in the band. We went 2 da Honeybee Inn to do practic.

“Hi, cunt” sed Aries Atrophy Funeral Madden Gainsbough. She was wearin a black corset top wif a black miniskirt and black fishnets. She wore lots of black eyeliner ova her purple eyes and black lipstick ned her hair was ebony blak. She was a vampire but she only ate salad.

“Hi bitch.” I sed back. I luked around the room and saw Bart Walace. He was waring his white goffik face paint and black t shirt dat sed “Gerard Way” on da front. Instead of a gun his arm was a razorblade. He was a vampire but his parents died in a car crash. Also we call him Diaboliq now bcos its more gothix. “Hi Diaoliq” I smeled Sarcastly. Red XIII was also there, he wos exatly the same but we call him Crimson DCLXVI now (AN: dat is roman numel for 666) and he wore a black Mohawk and lots of eyeliner, also he is a person now.

“Ok bitch lets play” sed Aries statistically. We playd The Chronicles of Life and Death by GC. “You come in cold, Your covered in blood. They're all so happy you've arrived. The doctor cuts your cord. Hands you to your mom. She sets you free into this life.” I sang heartly.

But what about Tiga and Yuffie???

NED OF CHAPTER 4 ok next part comin up rel soon.

As a former fangirl of Vincent Valentine, I must say that I love your depiction of him - it brings out a totally new side of his character!

My Chem and Green Day nods. I now officially like you, no matter what anyone else says <333

THX 4 ALL DA KL COMMETS Ok time for chater 5 :) Dis is sexi so VIOWA DISCRETUN ADVISD

Afta practice I went wif Tiga 2 da 7th heathen. �Luk Tiga� I sed dispiritenly �I has to tell u something......�

�What is it Cloud u can tell me� she smelled aroudely. Suddely she took off her shirt and reveled her body. She woz covered in scars bcos she was a Stanist and did pain rituls wif Diaboliq. She was also a sadits and cut herslef sumtyms. I suddenly noticed my boy thingie was growing. But I had to tell Tiga the turth...

�TIGA� I scremed depres �SEPIPOT HAS TOLD ME 2 KILL U AND YUFIE!� Tidas mascara ran down her face in a really cool spooky luk like in Da Coreps Bride. �YOU FUCKING TWAT!!!� she crid and ran out!

Suddely someone came... It was Yuffie! �Hajimemashite Cloud� she said goffikly �u look Kawaii�

I was cryin tears of crimson blood in a depres way. Yuffie came ova. �Dont cry Cloud� she frowned sexily.

�But everything is ruined!� I scremed in a gothic way �Tiga will neva love me tru agen!� i started to cry agen, bloody tears riveting down mi face. Den Yuffie noticed my thingie.

�Dat luks kawaii� she said sadistly. Den suddenly we started 2 french passively! �U want 2 do it?� She said questionedly

�Mmmm� I replid angstily. Den I put my boy thingie into hers and we did it for the first time!

NED OF CHAPTER Ok next one up soon.

I fap to this

As a former fangirl of Vincent Valentine, I must say that I love your depiction of him - it brings out a totally new side of his character!


I fap to this

I could draw....
but too lazy....

to draw lazily drawn pictures...

This is too bad to be genuine.

This is too bad to be genuine.

Seconded... however, compared with some of the fanfics here (http://www.fanfiction.net)... well, the less said the better.

Least it isn't as bad as the script to a Uwe Boll movie... or it could be...

This is too bad to be genuine.

QFFT

This is too bad to be genuine.

I must say, I'm actually enjoying this story :D!

CHAPTA 6 thx for all the commets :) but can u STOP MASTACATING PLEASE. It is againts God LOL acturly im a stanist ned I mastate all the time :) Also STOP FLAMING. I HAVE SYSLEXIA ND IF U FLAME U R A PREP

I was so fuken depres. Why did I do it wif Yuffie? And what abot Aepiroth? I had slit my writs and the crimson blud ran down my arms in riverts. I stard thru red eyes into da nite. I was wearin dark blak goffik boots ad a dark blak t shirt wif Korn on da frunt. I was werin dark purpol eyeliner, lipstick and nel varnitch and my hare wus died dark purpe. My swod which was shinin in da moonlit was blak wif a pic of Joel Madden on da bak. The suddenly….. Diaboliq came!

“@#!�$/%@ nigga” sed Diaboliq sadistly

I was shuked. “Diaboliq blak ppl cant be goffix” I scremed sexily.

“Im sorry Cloud #�%*@?\^&” sed Diaboliq den he stated 2 cri tearz of blud. He looked creepy and goffix like in da movie Sweny Todd

“Dats ok, bitch” I sed amorosly.

“Anyway I saw u talkin 2 Yuffie” he sed darkly.

“So?” I sed casurly colly.

“Do u lik Yuffie?” Diaboliq sed wif a honest look.

“NO of curse not” I gothiqly smeled a vampire smel ned changed the subjet “N e wai have u seen Tiga???”

“$^@%*#�+@# Oh yeh I cam 2 tell u Tiga was luken rlly deprzzing I thick she may slit her wrirts” sed Diabolico depres

“”FUK U SHE IS NOT DED” I sad goffikly. I was so hyperactive, I wuz cryin tears of ruby blood in2 da moonlight. Den I went 2 fid Tida!

NED OF CHAPTA DATS ALL FOKS lol i joke i will make arrangemets for more chapters :)

I have five points to raise in response to your first sentence of your last post.

First Point
Everyone has the right to praise or flame anyone about anything. It's human nature to do so. You have no right to turn around and demand people to not flame you. You have two options in response to that. A: Ignore it. B: Respond in kind. Choose one.

Second Point
The subject content of your 'fanfic' is grounds enough for someone to flame and tear apart. Granted it could conceivably be loosely termed a fanfic, but how you have portrayed Cloud, Tifa, Yuffie and Vincent is beyond laughable. Yet it is typical of the standard whiny emo faboys/girls who blindly follow the trend of loving something because others do. Having said that, it is a fanfic so normal rules don't really apply.

Third Point
Usually a fanfic is more than one or two paragraphs. If you intend to follow on with 'this', you should add more content in each post, instead of ramblings.

Fourth Point
Spelling and grammar... Use Microsoft Office or OpenOffice (The latter being a freeware version of MS Office) and use the spellcheck function. Reading anything with a few spelling errors is annoying, but reading every post with nothing but blatent spelling errors is pathetic. There are options available to correct that (As I stated above), and failure to do something about it is truly sad.

Fifth Point
I know people who suffer from Dyslexia, yet unlike you, they do NOT use it as a excuse or a crutch. You stated at the beginning of this thread and I quote:


OK this is my first fanfic ever, I love Final Fantasy! I am Dyslexic so b kind if my disroder efects my gramma.

By that statement there, you are blaming your poor grammar skills etc on your disease. Grow up.

I have five points to raise in response to your first sentence of your last post.

First Point
Everyone has the right to praise or flame anyone about anything. It's human nature to do so. You have no right to turn around and demand people to not flame you. You have two options in response to that. A: Ignore it. B: Respond in kind. Choose one.

Second Point
The subject content of your 'fanfic' is grounds enough for someone to flame and tear apart. Granted it could conceivably be loosely termed a fanfic, but how you have portrayed Cloud, Tifa, Yuffie and Vincent is beyond laughable. Yet it is typical of the standard whiny emo faboys/girls who blindly follow the trend of loving something because others do. Having said that, it is a fanfic so normal rules don't really apply.

Third Point
Usually a fanfic is more than one or two paragraphs. If you intend to follow on with 'this', you should add more content in each post, instead of ramblings.

Fourth Point
Spelling and grammar... Use Microsoft Office or OpenOffice (The latter being a freeware version of MS Office) and use the spellcheck function. Reading anything with a few spelling errors is annoying, but reading every post with nothing but blatent spelling errors is pathetic. There are options available to correct that (As I stated above), and failure to do something about it is truly sad.

Fifth Point
I know people who suffer from Dyslexia, yet unlike you, they do NOT use it as a excuse or a crutch. You stated at the beginning of this thread and I quote:



By that statement there, you are blaming your poor grammar skills etc on your disease. Grow up.


U JUST A PREP

U JUST A PREP

And that affects me how?

:facepalm:

You don't get it. . .

:facepalm:

You don't get it. . .

:facepalm:

You don't get it. . .

Meh... must be a Gen Y thing.

THRILLHO

:zillafire:

OK Tym 4 chapter 7 and can u STOP FLAMING PREPZ. I HAV A LERNING DISABILITY NED IF U FLAME UR A RACIST PREP!

I had gone 2 see Tiga in NEIBELHEIM (c is dat speld rong?) ad suddenly Aries appeared! She was wearin a black dress wif skull patterns on it. Also she wuz wearin blak fishnets and a blak shoe dat sed Marilyn Manson on in goffik letters. She smiled a goffix smile ad luked at me in a depres way thru forrest green eyes.

“I am sorry Cloud there has ben an accidet,” She scremed depresly. Hers wos red and large.

“NOOO WERE IS TIGA” I said solemly. I culdent fucking beleive it.

“I foud her wif her writs slit. Dont worri i used a core spell ad calld da copz she is in da hospital now” she said resurdly. I was casual.

“i am so fuken sepres” I Stated enthusicly. I wet in2 Tidas room to wach depress movies like Das niteMARE b4 Xmas (AN: If u dunt no what dat is ur a fucken prep!) and slit my wrist. My eyes which were depress blue cried bloody tearz in a sadistic way. Suddenly who was there but Lindsay?

“OMFG WAT ARE U DOING IN TIGAS ROOM” I sed quietly. Den i saw it.... He was masticating and so was Sephirot! “OMG GTFO!” I sed.

“I shalt leave” sed sepipot racistly “But thou shouldst remeber wat I sed Cloud” den he went!

Wat was i gunna do?

NED OF CHAPTER OK sorry its short i had WRITERZ BLOCK ok next chaptar up soon

OK Tym 4 chapter 7 and can u STOP FLAMING PREPZ. I HAV A LERNING DISABILITY NED IF U FLAME UR A RACIST PREP!

How can a person be racist if they are not saying anything derogatory about your nationality? Where in any of my posts have I said anything racist? Do you even know the meaning of the word?

So you have a learning disability, there are ways to properly spellcheck your work, with the programs I said about in my earlier posts. Stop blaming your condition as there are ways to better yourself without falling back on that.

Also, if I was flaming your story I would say something like:

"OMG, THIS STORY IS SHIT! YOU ARE SHIT!"

However, I have NOT said that... so STFU.

UR JUST A RACIST PREP!

Oh hai thar (http://myimmortalrehost.webs.com/)

Oh hai thar (http://myimmortalrehost.webs.com/)

Damn it, I was just about to bring that up. The similarities are way too obvious for this to be unintentional.

Definition of Prep (Noun)

bitchy person with an attitude that they're better than everyone else; only nice to their other bitchy attitudinal friends

Wow... I mean, wow. I'm so hurt by being called that. It cut so deeply into my psyche I don't know what I'm going to do.

Ok... I'll let you nimrod (Q-Tip Trepe) know my opinion of this story:

You are an idiot, ignoring your dyslexia for the moment and focusing on the subject matter alone of this 'story', is cringeworthy at best and utter sludge at worst. The terrible grammar and syntax that makes it appear to be written by a five year old doesn't help. Sure I could be compassionate and understanding due to the Dyslexia, but I'm not going to let it cloud my judgement about what is a terrible fanfiction

Instead of writing 'this' out on Notepad or Wordpad, get a proper program like Microsoft Office (Word) or OpenOffice (Writer) and use them to write your drivel out on, as they do have a spellcheck program to help correct some of the spelling errors.

If stating this, and my above posts makes me a 'Prep', so what? Who the Hell do you think you are to subject the forum to this drivel? STFU and Fuck Off!

I don't care where it's from.

IT WAS REAL TO ME.

:p

XD, bro, you need to chill. We're all having fun with this, and you can't even take in-context, good natured jabs.

I just find it amusing. Sure everything about this fanfic is terrible, but I'm not going to run around saying it. Why? Because like Neg has said already; we're all having fun with this.

I'm an American and support his right to state the obvious. Its that same freedom of speech that lets me tolerate the aforementioned shitty fanfic. It's not like the guy will cease writing. This is far too bad to be accidental.

Yeah, man... you got to chill Xiahou Dun.
We are having fun, it's not always about laying down the law?

We're going to blindfold him and take him to Chuck E Cheese. If that doesn't work, TICKLE WAR!!!

It's a plan!

Can I join? PLEASE!!! I'm a tickle MASTER I promise!!

I always assume you're in on every bit of mischief we plan. We're a team, yo.

I dunno guys. What if that doesn't work? Is there a plan C??

Talking shit. It's worth than swift death, you know :smrt:

I'll fap if I want to you cunt.

Talking shit. It's worth than swift death, you know :smrt:

Very true. Seems like you guys are on top of things then :D.

I always assume you're in on every bit of mischief we plan. We're a team, yo.

Yayay! ;D :D

Nice to see this is all progressing along nicely.

WHERE IS THE SEZINESS?


We have been eagerly waiting!

I've lost my will to draw... :(

You know, me too... Especially seziness. I need a new chapta to revive it...

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU

I spent thirty minutes making an epic reply and lost it because I fucking timed out.

Fuck this shit.

Alas, all good things must come to an end~

I might post the sequel sometime, it's set in an entirely yaoi FFVII-meets-rocky-horror universe.

It's more of a spiritual sequel.

:tommydissapproves:

Please no...

I might post the sequel sometime, it's set in an entirely yaoi FFVII-meets-rocky-horror universe.

It's more of a spiritual sequel.

That is one of the best things I've ever read.

:tommydissapproves:

Please no...

Now let's not jump the gun here just yet. Now the OP did say it's going to be a spiritual sequel.

No nevermind. That shit's gay.

OH NO

(http://img156.imageshack.us/i/facepalm2u.jpg/)

(http://img156.imageshack.us/i/facepalm2u.jpg/)

Seconded

(http://img156.imageshack.us/i/facepalm2u.jpg/)

Damn, I love that :D

(http://img156.imageshack.us/i/facepalm2u.jpg/)

Thirded.

OK this is my first fanfic ever, I love Final Fantasy! I am Dyslexic so b kind if my disroder efects my gramma.

Hi my name is Cloud Darkness Strife. I live in Nibelhim with Tiga Lockhart ned i am a vampire. I have been a vampire ever since i could remember, i was adopted at birth so i will neva no my tru parents. As you are reading this I open my pale red eyes into the darkness of the sky and shake off my long, spiky blonde hair. I am wearing a long black cloak with a purple and red trim and a pic of Marilyn Manson on da back. I was wearin a tight leather jeans and fingerless gloves lyk Hayley William frum Paramore. In case you culdnt tell I am a Goth and I love goffik music. I smiled a vampire smile and tuk out my swod, which was long and thick and very sharp. I put my swod on my shuldert and stepped outside into the night...

Suddenly who came but Tida!!! �Hi Cloud� she scremed softly. I was effervesced by her calm demenor. She was weran a black fishnet tights wif black boots and a black top dat sed GG Allin on da frunt. Tiga was also a vampir, and lik me she never new her real parents cos they dies in a car crash. �Well, see you later� she smelled statistically. She flew by wif her raven black hair.

END OF CHAPTER 1. I will make arrangmenets for the next chapter :) BE PATIENT OK FUCK U

Awesome.

:popcorn:

:sigh:

:ohgod:

WHERE IS THIS GUY!?