Anything anyone has to say about 'em would be appreciated.

Where Is The Me I Used To Know

By Tom Dougherty

I walk through life like a madman
Staring backwards at the past
I try to find some comfort
In the things that I have done
But all I see is useless
The time I've spent here is gone

I've made some awful choices
And still they haunt me
Never to escape the sorrow
And still I'm here forever
But now I can't escape
The past clouds up the future

And I'm here
And I can't get free
And the time I've spent
Is wasted now
And I know
I can't escape the chains
And I'm sorry
For what I've done to you

Broken inside I tear out my soul
I feel the pain forever
I wish I'd done something else
But now I wish you'd kill me
'Cause I deserve to die
Just get it over with

I feel insane
Because of what I've done to you
You feel the hate coming from me
It burns in you as well
You wish you'd never met me
And now I know just why

And I'm here
And I can't get free
And the time I've spent
Is wasted now
And I know
I can't escape these chains
And I'm sorry
For what I've done to you

Where is the me
That I used to know?
He should be here
But he's gone
And I've lost him
And I'm sorry
For what I've done to you


what's going on?

By Tom Dougherty

I can't figure out my brain
At times I think I've gone insane
I don't know what I should do
I wish it would all just go away

No more can I take the pain
No longer can I live this way
No more can I be this sane
I feel as if my life's lived all in vain

Yeah, I see it there
I see it so clear
The misdirection of my mind
I can't fathom why I'm here
The real me died long ago

And I'm screaming
That I can't understand
And I don't know why
I can't take it anymore

Now please go away
Leave me to myself
I don't believe in me anymore
I wish that I would just disappear
I feel that I may die tonight
I sometimes fear

That I may never wake up again
And that is when I know at last
This pain is here inside me
I can't escape from it
There's simply too much fear

My life is all about my own selfish fears
What's going on?


There Is No Reason�..

By Tom Dougherty

There is no reason to go on living
There is no reason to survive this long
There is no reason to go on living
Except that dying hurts, yeah

I doubt myself and all my feelings
I doubt that I should even care
I don't know why I can't escape them
Except that dying hurts, yeah

I feel the flame I feel the fire
It's burning in me like a furnace
I know the pain of every memory
Which is why dying hurts, yeah

There is no reason to go on living
There is no reason to go on living
There is no reason to go on living
There is no reason to be fucking living
Even though dying hurts, yeah


Don't Bring Me Down

By Tom Dougherty

I walk this way because I can
I think these thoughts because that's me
I realize that time has told you
All of the things that I have done
I do not care about you at all
I only ask for one thing from you
Leave me alone with my own self

Don't bring me down I'm broken
Don't tell me lies to keep me silent
I know just how the world is
I say goodbye as I have learned
And I know you won't return
Because I've kept myself this way
And now I wish you'd go away

I have seen things that terrify me
And I know that they are real
Because of pain inside of me
I hate to think of myself
As anything besides a mystery
And I know that I'm unreal
I have no past I have no present

Don't bring me down I'm broken
Don't tell me lies to keep me silent
I know just how the world is
I say goodbye as I have learned
And I know you won't return
Because I've kept myself this way
And now I wish you'd go away

I feel a change in disposition
Towards me when I see you
You found the hate that burns in you
And you turned it 'round on me
So I destroy us and we're gone
The pain of mystery is astounding
And I know that it is real

Don't bring me down I'm broken
Don't tell me lies to keep me silent
I know just how the world is
I say goodbye as I have learned
And I know you won't return
Because I've kept myself this way
And now I wish you'd go away

Don't bring me down
I can't take this shit anymore
And I see the pain within you
It's the same that is in of me
I feel twisted inside out
And I see that you are too

Don't bring me down I'm broken
Don't tell me lies to keep me silent
I learned too well all that is true
We say goodbye, but never learn
And now we will not return
Because I've left us all this way
And now at last we've gone away


Long Ago

By Tom Dougherty

Do you like destroying things?
I now believe you do
You could have brought me back to life
Instead you ran me through
You tear my soul right in two
And laugh at what I say to you
You think I know not what I do
But here is what I'm telling you

I am here forever
You were gone long ago
You left me behind
But I passed you by
And now it's me
Who's laughing at you

Did you get a rise out of
Tearing me in two?
You could have left me well alone
But that's not what you do
You laugh at all the things I do
Don't know what I have said to you
You don't know what I have done
But now at last you will learn

I am here forever
You were gone long ago
You left me behind
But I passed you by
And now it's me
Who's laughing at you

Laughing fools are staring into me
I tell them to be gone forever
They follow me and tear my world apart
And now I feel the rage exploding through
I break the wall in my frustration
I cannot live with what I've done
I wish the pain would go away
But now there's nothing left for me to do


The Feelings In Me

By Tom Dougherty

I wish I had no feelings
They only make me hurt
I wish I had no feelings
They only make me hurt
And it feels like I am sighing

Yeah

I cannot see through my eyes
They are not mine at all
I cannot see through my eyes
They are not mine at all
And it feels like I am crying

Yeah

I don't understand the pain
It makes me scream for more
I don't understand the pain
It makes me scream for more
And it feels like I am dying

Yeah

But I feel
And I see
And it burns in me forever
And I know
And I care
But I don't care to understand just why

I will not go on living
I only long for death
I will not go on living
I only long for death
And it feels like I am gone again, again, again

Yeah

And I know
Why I'm here
I can't leave
And I fear
That I know
Why I'm here
I am here for your amusement

Yeah I can't feel the pain
And I don't know the reason
And I can't see the tears
And I am lost forever in you

You make me feel like sighing
You make me feel like crying
You make me feel like dying
You make me feel like I am gone again


The Wall

By Tom Dougherty

You stare into the wall before my eyes, it scares you
You see into the dark recesses far beyond
There is no fear or pain or love or hate or sorrow
The only thing within my mind is emptiness
You can't determine how to go about seeing me
And so you turn around and run away again

The wall covers my eyes
An iron facade filling my mind
All emotion is left behind
The only thing is emptiness

You scream and run in all the frustration you're feeling
The mind's eye closes down on you and you are trapped
There is no love or hate or rage or pain or sorrow
The only thing you're feeling now is emptiness
I have dragged you inside of the lost inner vortex
And now you're bound to feel what I have always felt

The wall covers my eyes
And iron facade filling my mind
All emotion is left behind
The only thing is emptiness


Welcome to Everlost

By Tom Dougherty

Welcome to the world of nothing
No one here was ever alive
Come on in and look for something
Nothing here you're likely to find
Empty space fills up this place

Twisting perception
Tearing your soul
Everlost has you
And never will it let you go

Welcome to the world of no one
Nothing here was ever alive
Trapped inside you'll see the colors
Colors that fill up your mind
It's all just a state of mind

Twisting perception
Tearing your soul
Everlost has you
And never will it let you go

Follow me and see this place
I can bring you here for all time
Come in willing or I'll take you
And never will you escape
Because now you belong to me

Twisting perception
Tearing your soul
Everlost has you
And never will it let you go
It will never ever let us go

Welcome to the world of illusion
Everything you see is unreal
Listen to the silent voices
And they tell you you can't be free
Everlost has taken you from life

Twisting perception 'round and 'round
Ripping out your empty soul
The darkness of Everlost has you
And never again will it ever let you go
It is never going to let you go


Fallen Angels

By Tom Dougherty

I hide myself inside the things that you say
I feel my world right now is slipping away
I've dragged you down into the fear of today
And you have no more reason to believe me

Yeah

Now I feel I should be alive if not dead
I see myself inside the things you have said
You tear my soul apart inside of my head
I lay myself down on the fire of death's bed

Yeah

Taken alive into the tomb
Scream to be released
After I am done my soul drifts into the fire
Bringing out the demons once again
And it's just myself stuck back in my life

Yeah

I cannot feel remorse for what I have done
I stare at you until you go get the gun
I'm running this race that you've already won
I fall again now up and into the sun

Yeah

I see a torrent of the pain that I feel
It washes over me the wounds do not heal
I'm falling down I hope that it is not real
You can't see life when it's with death that you deal

Yeah

Taken alive into the tomb
Scream to be released
After I am done my soul drifts into the fire
Bringing out the demons once again
And it's just myself stuck back in my life


Time's End

By Tom Dougherty

Darkness somewhere
And it binds you
Things within
That try to find you
Lurking madness
Stares in your eyes
Life around you
Slowly it dies

All around you
You'll find no one
Looking upward
See the blank sun
They've all left you
Far behind them
Now the fear
Creeps up your spine

Life around you starts to fade
Nothing left for you to say
Everything has gone away
Night has swallowed up the day



Hopefully

By Tom Dougherty

I wish I could tear my mind to pieces
Wish I could turn my life around
I find that I have lost myself
And I will never be me again

I fall through the cracks in time
And I find myself destroyed
I feel only this desolation
My soul is trapped in the past

Sins of the past destroy my future
And though I know that I am wrong
There's nothing left for me to let go
I have nothing, I am gone

Bringing down the horrid failure
I fear I'll never wake up
I am only what I make me
And I don't like what I've done

I wish I could rip the past asunder
And fill up the empty hurting void
So maybe I'd be a real person
And then I'd stop driving you away

The sins of the past fill up my vision
Until I can see nothing else
I wish I could care about the world
But I have nothing left to give

Torn, my soul is scarred forever
The pain should have killed me long ago
But I keep thinking it will get better
And death isn't there anymore

I cannot forgive myself for feeling
And I wish that I was real
I never ever meant to hurt you
But now it's all that I can do



Longing

By Tom Dougherty

There are too many things I see
And they are destroying me

Help me�.

I cannot feel within this pain
And it's driving me insane

Help me!

I'm drowning in my own torment
And my perception is spent

HELP ME!

Forget the past
The future can't exist
'Cause it won't last
So please won't someone help me?

There is no ending to each day
I wish that I would go away

Free me�.

I'm broken down under it all
And now I am going to fall

Free me!

It hasn't lasted very long
It is the end of my song

FREE ME!!!!!

Forget the past
The future can't exist
'Cause it won't last
So please won't someone free me?

I'm searching
You're hiding
I'm open
You slam the door

So please
Please someone help me

Help me find
My way back
Into me
Into you

Please won't someone kill me?


Memories

By Tom Dougherty

Sometimes it's better to be someone else
'Cause I'm not me anymore
Sometimes it's better to be someone else
'Cause I'm not me anymore

If I'm not me I feel no pain
And I can do whatever I want
Then I won't be sad for what I've done
But I am taking it out on you
But I am taking it out on you

Sometimes I miss being who I was
'Cause I'm not me anymore
Sometimes I miss being who I was
'Cause I'm not me anymore

If I'm not me I feel no pain
And I can do whatever I want
Then I won't be sad for what I've done
But I am taking it out on you
But I am taking it out on you

Sometimes I wish I was someone else
'Cause I'm not me anymore
Sometimes I wish I was someone else
'Cause I'm not me anymore

I am no one
I am nothing
I have no mind of my own
And I am taking it out on you
Yeah I am taking it out on you

Sometimes I can feel this pain inside me
'Cause I'm not me anymore
Sometimes I can feel this pain inside me
'Cause I'm not myself anymore

If I'm not me I feel no pain
And I can do whatever I want
Then I won't be sad for what I've done
But I am taking it out on you
Why am I taking it out on you?

I am no one
I am nothing
I have no mind of my own
And I am taking it out on you
Yeah I am taking it out on you

Sometimes I can see what I'm doing
'Cause I'm not me anymore
Sometimes I can see what I'm doing
'Cause I'm not me anymore

There are some things
That I don't know
And inside I feel
That I am gone
And I can see inside
But there's nothing there anymore

I am no one, nothing at all
I have no mind of my own
So I am taking it out on you
Yeah I am taking it out on you

If I'm not me I feel no pain
And I can do whatever I want
Then I won't be sad for what I've done
But I am taking it out on you
I am taking it all out on you

Then I feel
And I know
'Cause I'm not me anymore

Sometimes I wake up and I'm screaming
'Cause I'm not me anymore
Sometimes I wake up and I'm screaming
'Cause I'm not me anymore

'Cause I'm not me - anymore

I am no one
I am nothing
I have no mind of my own
And I am taking it out on you
Why am I doing this to you?

If I'm not me, I still feel pain
And I still do things I don't want to do
And I am still sad for what I have done
And so I take it out on you
Yeah, I'm taking it out on you
Yeah, I am taking it out on you


Eulogy Of An Angel

By Tom Dougherty

I've lost my forsaken mind
Stolen by the end of time
There is something out of line
No more can I ever shine
Blackening you are my shrine
I taste the bitter poisoned wine

I've destroyed you finally
The end of you means end of me
I see what no one else can see
And I wish I would cease to be
There is no where left to flee
Don't listen to my final plea

I can't decide what else to do
I think I've got more wrong than you

I can't decide what I have done
I think I've lost and you have won

I can't decide what I should be
I think you killed what's left of me

I can't see into your poor soul
I think I lost mine long ago

Never will I go away
Never am I here to stay
Never can I be this way
Never shall I see today

I'm sorry you can't understand
The pain and sorrow in this man
I feel like I'm the fool who sees
The empty space inside of me

But it will never be whole again
I seem to have fallen out of time
I think I tore your heart apart
I wish that you could see this face
And know the truth of who I am


Mistake

By Tom Dougherty

What's done is done
And you can't change it
Nothing you can say or do
Will make any difference
To the past

It seems unchanged
The spell I'm under
Everything that I can feel
Fades in to nonexistence
In the past

The blackest words
Are empty feelings
Everything inside of me
Is left within a world of pain
Made by me

What's done is done
And you can't change it
Nothing you can say or do
Will make any difference
To the past

I've lost myself
But where did I go?
Makes no fucking sense to me
Seems I cannot live this way
In the past

In tortured dreams
I see a new place
Something started long ago
Brings out a new feeling here
I can't see

What's done is done
And you can't change it
Nothing you can say or do
Will make any difference
To the past


Myself As Is

By Tom Dougherty

I feel these changes
Coming down on me
I feel these changes
Out of my control

I cannot fight these changes
I watch them tear my soul apart
I can't control what I see now
And it's too much to bear
Why is life this way?

I'm losing my soul
The beast it calls me
I'm losing my soul
It's fading away

I cannot fight these changes
I watch them tear my soul apart
I can't control what I see now
And it's too much to bear
Why is life this way?

I am a curse now
Upon my own self
I am a curse now
Upon you all now

I try to fight these changes
But they just tear my soul apart
I've lost control of what I see
It's just too much to bear
And life is just this way

The end of my soul is illusion
I've done this to myself
The darkness that I feel
Is just a part of me now
This deadly poison
Is something in my blood

I cannot fight these changes
I watch them tear my soul apart
I can't control what I see now
And it's too much to bear
I guess life is that way


The Games We Play

By Tom Dougherty

All things must come to an end
These are the games we play
These are the games we play
All things must crumble away
These are the games we play
What are these games we play?

Why do we hurt each other
Just because we can?
Why do we kill each other
Just because we can?
So just rip out my soul
Don't want it anymore
So just tear it apart
Don't want it
I don't want it anymore

Even when things are all right
These are the games we play
These are the games we play
Fuck living, it's not worth it
These are the games we play
What are these games we play?

So sacrifice each other
Just because you can
So go destroy each other
Just because you can
So just rip out my soul
Don't want it anymore
So just leave me alone
Don't want you
I don't want you anymore

Because we don't understand
These are the games we play
These are the games we play
Try looking once in your life
These are the games we play
What are these games we play?

Consciously control these feelings
Break the spiral hounding me
I can't see why I still know you
And still you refuse to see
The games you play with other's lives

Stop thinking about yourself
These are the games we play
These are the games we play
Try feeling once in your life
These are the games we play
All of these games we play

Go and destroy yourself now
Just because you can
Leave living to the worthy
Just because you can
So just rip out my soul
Don't need it anymore
Fuck off, leave me alone
Don't need you
I don't need you anymore

Consciously control these feelings
See the mad spiral in me
I can't see why I still know you
And still you refuse to see
The games you play with other's lives

Only in time will we tell
These are the games we play
These are the games we play
I hate me more than you do
These are the games we play
What in hell are these games we are playing with our lives?

I don't need you
I don't want you
I don't need it
I don't want it
I don't need or want except to die

The final game we play


The Other Half

By Tom Dougherty

It's time for me to be put to rest
He's on his way and he's back to stay
Don't say goodbye not like I'm leaving
I just won't be here ever again

These words inside are left unspoken
Screaming at me to let them all go
Forever I followed his shadow
He's all that is left of what I was

I don't want to go
But I cannot stay
I can't see myself
Living one more day
Bring out other half
Leave this one behind
But I don't want to go

Time again for me to go away
And let the other side of me stay
Leave me alone I just do not care
This man's half was never ever there

Rage is something I don't ever want
But it haunts me and I can't escape
Let the other one take care of it
He's better able to anyway

I may not like him, but I don't give a shit
You may not need him, but I don't give a shit
He may not like me, but I don't give a shit
You might still need me
But you can't save me

I don't want to go
But I cannot stay
I can't see myself
Living one more day
Bring out other half
Leave this one behind
But I don't want to go
But I'm already gone